October Horror Cinema - One Sentence Reviews

So, pretty much like everyone else who has access to streaming services, I tend to spend more time browsing trailers and adding things to my list than I do actually watching things on my list. I know - first world problems and also a bit of ADD with some inability to choose? Fear of commitment maybe?

Anyways, armchair psychological diagnoses aside, since my partner and I are both into horror movies and the fall/October motif, we decided to upend the never-ending selection process by throwing the titles of the movies we want to watch into a random selector website (I know, revolutionary right?) and have the program decide what we're going to watch, thus eliminating the all too common occurrence of one of us (her) falling asleep before the other (me) can pick something out. We managed six, and while the handful of movies we watched ranged from decent to pretty good, there's still nothing as horrifying as watching 'The Strangers' for the first time in theaters. I've yet to re-experience that fear. Maybe next year. In the meantime, here's some one sentence reviews that will maybe persuade you to watch something new. Or, at the very least, add something else to your own ever-growing list. 

0/5 = did not finish
1/5 = finished while doing something else
2/5 = decent
3/5 = will mention during happy hour
4/5 = still thinking about it a few days later.
5/5 = watch it. Now. 

Happy Halloween. Oh, and also... make sure you vote!

​Dark was the Night: (Prime video) A blue-tinged creature feature with over emphasized themes and just as many teeth. 1/5

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​We Summon the Darkness​: (Netflix) Scream queen, satanic panic homage with a few bloody twists that'll keep you entertained until the power goes out. 3/5

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​I See You: (Prime Video) A disturbing psychological trip with some interesting narrative choices that'll leave you appreciating a film and checking your closets at the exact same time. 3/5

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​The Platform: (Netflix) You won't eat, and you'll be both disturbed and disgusted by the extremely accurate depiction of human nature in this guttural look at society and caste systems. 4/5

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​The Other Lamb: (Hulu/Red Box) Despite a slow beginning, a tense, atmospheric feature that was beautifully shot and will cater to the cult fanatic in all of us. 3/5

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​Hubie Halloween: (Netflix) Okay, so it's not horror, but it is an Adam Sandler romp through the old days of Happy Gilmore, Little Nicky, and Billy Madison set against the natural Halloween backdrop: Salem. 3/5